Ways to Piss of Bleach characters
by Byakuya-Renji
Summary: Need ways to piss of Bleach characters, well i have them right here. Come have a look.
1. Byakuya

60 Ways To Piss Off Byakuya Kuchiki

1) Set him up on a blind date with Renji, and blame it on Yoruichi

2) Send him love letter, say they are from Renji

3) Ask him does he want a sex change

4) Say that Senbonzakura wants him to get one

5) Make wings with his scarf, when he has it on

6) Tell him that Rukia is pregnant

7) Tell him that the father is Ichigo

8) And that it will be the next head of the Kuchiki clan if he doesn't have a kid already.

9) Every time he walks in to a room sing, "Dude looks like a lady"

10) Ask if would like to join you on a nooner

11) Steal him scarf, and put in on Zambimaru

12) Tell him Renji has started a rumour that they slept together

13) Start that rumour

14) Take a picture of him in his boxers. (Yeh I think he would wear boxers)

15) Blow said picture up and put in on the wall in the captains meeting room

16) Tell him that Renji could kick his ass any day

17) Tell him that if he were in a relationship with a guy he would be the bottom

18) Tell Yachiru that Byakuya has some sweets for her, watch and laugh all day when she follows him around.

19) Have a big party in his manor

20) Invite everybody… I mean everybody

21) Ask Yoruichi to strip at said party

22) Tell him "he is your husband to be"

23) Say that it is an arraigned marriage and there is nothing he can do

24) Hug him

25) Skip away and say "Have a good day darling"

26) Leave a note on his desk that says, "I watch you masturbate"

27) Ask him he ever get an out of character urge to rape Renji

28) Tell him that he only became a captain because his grandfather was one

29) Play with his hair when he is doing paperwork

30) Braid his hair

31) Say long hair makes him look gay

32) Say he has dead ends

33) Help him with that, by cutting it short with Senbonzakura

34) If you really don't want to live, Gel it up

35) Next time you see him wolf whistle and say, "Looking good captain"

36) Call him light (Byakuya mean true light)

37) Say him and Yoruichi make a cute couple

38) Ask him if he wore a ribbon in his hair when he was younger

39) Tell him that Aizen thinks he is hot

40) Ask him if he like bananas… then Grin

41) Sneak in to his manor and but a red sock in with his captains robe washing

42) Laugh when it turns pink

43) Laugh harder when he has to were it

44) Tell him it was Ichigo

45) Run in to the captains meeting with pink flowery boxer and say "Captain you left your boxers in the office".

46) Run

47) Tell him that he is stupid and you could out smart him any day

48) Tell him that Hisana never loved him, she only wanted his money.

49) Spank him

50) Play tug-a-war with his scarf

51) Lend his scarf to Ukitake and return it with blood stains on it

52) Invite him to a fish BBQ and let it slip that they are his fish

53) Get squad 6 to play twister on duty time

54) Get him to join in

55) Beat him every time

56) Tell him that you sperm jacked him

57) And that you are now having his child

58) And you are going to call it Renji

59) Kiss him

60) Walk away when he is talking to you


	2. Kenpachi Zaraki

61 way to piss of Kenpachi Zaraki

1)offer to put his hair bells on for him

2)better yet, steal said hair bells

3)say yachiru did it

4)if yachiru say she will tell kidnap her

5)torture her by stealing her ice-cream

6)give her ice-cream to byakuya

7)exclaim in a loud voice saying how you didn't think it was possible for him to be beaten by the pansy-ass ichigo

8)say eye paches are for gay's

9)paint his eyepatch with hearts rainbows and stars

10)say only loner don't know the name of there swords

11)tell him ikkaku and yumichika are fucking behind his back

12)say that they want him to do a threesome with them next time

13) insist he joins in

14) video it

15) send it to all the other captains

16) tell yachiru kenny is her father

17) shout loudly at random moments : OMG they killed kenny! The Bastards!

18) whenever he walks in to a captain meeting play teh star wars theme song very load

19) tell him yachiru stole his position as captain

20) and that he is now her bitch

21) ping his bells and run away

22) saying mahhahaha

23) tell him hanatarou could kick his ass

24) say that byakuya is more manly than he is

25) get byakuya to tell him that eyepatches were so last century

26)make byakuya do the hair flick and walk away

27)you follow doing the same

28) tell him that gin was staring at his ass

29) tell him that aizen has a wall full of pic of him

30) even funnier, tell him tousen was staring at his ass

31) stalk him until he gets paranoid and starts smashing things

32) make him pay for everything he breaks

33) and make him fix them as well

34) climb on his back and sing "Ken-chaaaaan!" into his ear

35) wait until he goes to a hot spring and then dump byakuya's koi into it

36) tell Byakuya

37) blame Kenpachi for the death of the fish

38)Watch as Byakuya kills him

39)Take Pictures

40) wink at him and walk off

41) watch his WTF? face

42) and laugh

43) try calling his zanpakuto

44) slap your forehead and cry in mock surprise "oh! you don't HAVE a name!"

45)make one up

46) call it at random moments

47)hide behind a wall was say "Kenny its your zanpakutou speak to me"

48) record his answer

49)give in to Unohana and say he has gone mental and need treatment NOW

50) insist he goes and lock him up in a mental asylum forever

51)make him watch people fighting

52) forbid him to join in

53) visit him

54) bring yachiru

55) make him have a tea party with yachiru

56) bring lots of teddies

57) surround him with them

58) make him cuddle one

59)that one being a byakuya plushie

60) put him in a pink dress

61) send a picture of him in the pink dress cuddling the plushie to byakuya


	3. Ukitake

20 Ways to Piss off Ukitake

Steal his candy

Tell him that you will tell Byakuya 'he stole his fish'

And eats them

Tell him that Shunsui loves him

And wants to 'Make love to him'

Ask him if Captain Histsugaya is his long lost son

Die his hair black

Put Byakuya's hair things on him

Blame it on Rukia

Burn all his Paperwork

Eat his candy

In front of him

Don't tell him when Rukia goes to the human world

Tell Byakuya that Ukitake new but was not going to tell him

Get Sentaro and Kiyone to plait his hair when he is taking a nap

Ask him if his white hair was a result of years of drug abuse

Call him big Shiro

Glop him every time you see him

Tell him that Yachiru has more candy than he dose

Give him pictures of Shunsui in the shower


	4. Ichigo

20 Ways to Piss of Ichigo

Tell him that Rukia picked Renji over him

Tell him that you told Byakuya that he was keeping Rukia in his closet

Call him strawberry

Tell him that his hollow form is more manly than he is

Tell him that he would bottom in a guyXguy relationship

Tell him that he looks like Naruto with Spiky hair

Tell him that Renji could kick his ass any day

Steal his zanpakutou

Dye his hair pink in the middle of the night

Ask him if he would Cosplay as Yachiru

'Forget' to tell him that Kenpachi is looking for him

Ask him, 'why such a big sword, are you making up for something'

Tell him that you told Byakuya he got Rukia pregnant

Ask him if he wanted to be a strawberry when he was born

Say that Renji and him would make a good couple

Say ' just like a married couple' when they fight

Get Rukia to draw bunnies of his face at night

Tell him that no one likes him, they only want his power

Tell him that he is a fake Shinigami and never will be a real one

Tell him that Renji is smarter than he is


	5. Hitsugaya

20 Ways to Piss Off Histsugaya

Call him Shiro-Chan

Say he is small

Give him candy every time you see him

Ask if captain Ukitake is his long lost older brother

Tell Matsumoto that he wants a hug

And that she can have the week off

Pat him on the head and say 'good boy'

Call him little Shiro

Tell him Mayuri has developed a growth solution

Watch as he gets excited

Then tell him the truth. There is none

Tell him that Momo hates him

Tell him that Momo says Renji is better than him

Say he is stupid

Prove it by saying 'what is 1+1='

When he says 2 laugh and say NO, its Window stupid.

Tell him that he only became a captain because the other captains thought he was cute.

Steal his candy

Any time he drinks, Take it off him and say 'NO NO NO, you're under age'

Tell him his zanpakutou is too big for him.


	6. Shunsui

20 Ways to Piss off Shunsui

Flirt with Nanao

Steal him Sake

Call him lazy

Say that Ukitake was never him friend he was only using him (Only Jokein)

Tell him that long hair is for girls

Say that he looks wired in his hat

And that his 'Pink thing' Looks gay

Have Yachiru draw on him

Die his hair green

Then cut it all off

And say there is something wrong with him

Steal all his girls

Pick on the little girl part of his zanpakutou

Tell the head captain that he, he slacking off

Tell him that he is no longer attractive to woman

Tell him that they all want Byakuya, not him

Take his Captain title off him

Give it no Nanao and make him the vice-captain

Lock him in a room full of paper work

Don't let him out until he has done it all


	7. Senbonzakura

20 Ways to Piss of Senbonzakura

Steal his mask

Cut his hair short

Put him Byakuya hair peaces

Take his clothes

Replace them with Byakuya's

Say that you thought he was a girl

Say that his power is stupid (Well it is basically tossing pink flowers at the enemy)

Every time he walks in to a room say 'Shatter'

Send him flowers randomly (Make sure they are cherry blossoms)

Ask him if he wants to be a girl

Run away when he answers

Say that Byakuya hates him and wants a different sword

Ask him if his favourite colour is pink

Send him a dress

Make him wear it

Say it's from Zambimaru

Say that the boy half of Zambimaru loves him

Ask him if he would ever sleep with Sode no Shirayuki

Before he answers say ' is it because you are gay'

Grin and skip away leaving him very confused


	8. Grimmjow

20 Ways to Piss Off Grimmjow

Demote him to espada 7

Say that Ulquiorra Has a wall full of pictures of him in the shower

Call him Grim-kitty

Die his hair orange

Say he looks like Ichigo

Say that Aizen is his father

And Gin is his mother

Say that he would make a better Shinigami than an espada

Say that Luppi is more manly than he will ever be

Send him a bag of cat nip

Say it's stupid not to have a name for your sword

Give it a name (Fluffy)

Call that name whenever he is around

Ask him if he wants to have a threesome with Ichigo and his hollow form

When he says NO laugh and say he need to take a chill pill

Say he needs to get laid

Ask him 'Have you ever taken it up the tail pipe'

Give him a book about how to get a girl

Chop his other arm off

Draw lines on his face like Ulquiorra


	9. Rukia

20 Ways to Piss off Rukia

Say that Byakuya hates her

Say that she was only adopted because she looked like Hisana

Tell her that Renji is madly in love with her

Leave love notes on her desk

Say they are from Renji

Photoshop a pic of her and Renji and send it to Byakuya

Make her sit and listen when Byakuya gives her the 'sex' Talk

Call her week

Every time you see her call her Mrs Abarai

When she has a sissy fit laugh very loud

Tell Byakuya she is pregnant

Tell him that it's his (Somehow)

Tell her that Byakuya summoned her to his room

Then wolf-whistle

Make sure that Byakuya and Renji are in the room together at the time and make her interrupt their 'bonding session'

Give Ukitake a Love letter that says from Rukia

Tell her Sode no Shirayuki is prettier than her

Even worse, tell her Yumichika is

Tell her that Hanatarou has wanted to fuck her for months

Cut her hair in the middle of the night and blame it on Renji


	10. Renji

30 Ways to Piss Off Renji Abarai

1) Set him up on a blind date with Byakuya and blame it on Yoruichi

2) Tell him that Ichigo got Rukia pregnant

3) Steal all his head bands

4) And all his hair bands

5) Point at him when he walks past; make sure other girls can see him

6) Call him Red Pineapple

7) Scream very loud 'Renji has a hard on' when the captains are near

8) Start a rumour that he loves Byakuya

9) Steal all his glasses

10) Jump on his back and say 'Giddy up horses'

11) Walk over to him when he is doing paper work and pat him on the head and say 'who's the good boy'

12) Tell him that Ichigo is so much better than his

13) Lick him

14) Tell him he needs to lose wait

15) Call him 'Tarzan' and wave a banana in front of him

16) Tell Kenny that Renji wants to fight him

17) Leave love letters on his desk say they are from Gin

18) Ask him 'why such a huge Bankai, are you compensating for something?'

19) Say Zambimaru is stupid and Senbonzakura will kick his ass

20) Tell him that Rukia will never love him

21) Tell him that Rukia never was his friend she just wanted him for the sex

22) At Christmas sing the 'Renji the red haired death god' song

23) Say that he would so be on bottom in a guyXguy relationship

24) Say that the guy to top him would be Byakuya

25) Tell him chappy the bunny is going to visiting and Byakuya orders his squad to go dressed up ... as bunnies

26) Get him a very tight FEMALE bunny outfit

27) Ask him he has tattoos EVERYWHERE !

28) Tell him that he will never surpass Byakuya

29) And that he will be under him all the time... hint that the under can mean two things

30) Ask him if he draws on his tattoos every morning

31) Tell him that Byakuya wants to get him pregnant


	11. Aizen

**11 Ways to Piss off Aizen**

Brake his sword

Make all the esparder come to the good side

Say he looked so much better in glasses

Tell him that he will never be king of the hollows

Tell him that no one cares that he left to be evil

Tell him that gin loves him

Bet him that you are right

Then go and be right...lol

Dare him to do stuff with Gin

Film that stuff

Send it to the WSS


End file.
